Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Ice skating in my living room


My daughters took a whole bottle of pledge and sprayed all the floors of our duplex apartment last night in an effort to "help me."

I have mopped it several times and it is still as smooth as glass and slippery as an ice skating rink.

So now I have some choices:

I could get really angry and frustrated
or I could go skating

I had to take the day off from work to finish demo of the bathroom and hang the new doors. But I didn't want to get to working yet soooo....

Here I am sliding around my floors in tube soxs with Bob Segar music screaming in the background. Sunglasses on...I AM Tom Cruise from Risky Business!

Now there's an image you don't want to have early in the morning. The fat pastor sliding around in his boxers screaming "I love that old time rock and roll!" at the top of his lungs.

I have also discovered that if you call the dog into the room he will come running at nascar speed but be unable to make the turns and thus wipes-out when he tries to make the corner turns. This is endlessly funny and I have done it a dozen times. Also, he likes to wrestle with me and this gives me a huge "ultimate fighting" advantage. Even now he stares at me panting from the safety of the rug, unwilling to challenge the "dominator."

I have also discovered that cats spin really well. Recipe for fun: Place your cat on the shiny polished wood. Put your hand where thier belly is and start turning them counterclockwise. Faster and faster and they will uncurl and spread out, unable to do anything. When you have reached peak speed release them and watch them try to get up and slide about and run sideways. In several attempts I have yet to get bored, and in fact have laughed so hard that I have cried. They will probably go pee on my clothes upstairs...but it was totally worth it.

And today I will look for the hockey sticks and challenge my kids to a game of indoor hockey in the living room.

Because if life gives you lemons...make lemonade.
And if your daughters empty a whole cannister of pledge on the floor...sing Bob Segar songs, attack the dog, spin the cats, and play hockey.

the alternatives are no fun.

In many ways this is the concept of redemption. Buying back something that can be restored to usefullness. God could have just stayed furious with me, but instead sent His son to die for me and buy me back from the punishment that I literally 'damn well had coming.' So instead of hell and fury I get grace and love.

and the choice to do the same for others

or not

and today you will have to choose as well


Dardi Hendershott said...

Oh, this is beautiful!!! We love to hear that we are not the only insane...we have often said we should compile these stories into a book b/c real life is way funnier than made up stuff. Maybe a church fundraiser..."Real Life Stories of Stoners" :>)

david sherwood said...

don't even get me started on what i did and said when i spilled the paint today

Dardi Hendershott said...

Oh, I bet it was colorful!! Better you than me...I'm in the midst of painting as well. Gotta keep up with the new pastor & his lists!


blogger templates | Make Money Online